Ever wonder where those funny holiday pet pictures and captions come from every year? Well, we did a little research to find out who the secret author and artist is. Conclusion—Grandma is pretty funny. Here's some of her best work written from the pets' perspective that left us begging for more.
(And here you thought Grandma only used the internet to play solitaire and shop for yarn). Keep em coming Grandma!
1. Step Brothers
"Shh, don't tell anyone, little does the photographer know, but I filled the cute little sleigh with my favorite holiday kitty litter and am silently taking a dump as the Fritz the Pomeranian tries to steal the show just like last year. Sleigh bells ring, are you listenen, in the sleigh, snow is glistenen..." -- TOOTSIE THE CAT
2. Santa's Helpers
"Ok, who's the wise guy that put frozen cookies on the tray? I thought getting your tongue stuck was only for dumb little kids that lick cold pipes in the basement. Of course Simba over there is too busy sipping on his milk to help me out" -- BUSTER
3. Spot's First Christmas
"I can't wait to scare the crap out of that little bratty kid when he realizes I'm not just another fancy fake bow on the top of his little precious present that he can tear off, throw to the side and ignore when he opens the box hoping for a puppy. And once he realizes that "I" am the present and not the little cute puppy that he wanted, he better not name me Spot." --SPOT (TEMPORARY NAME ONLY)
4. Cluster Cat
"Hey humans, I've got a brilliant idea. Why don't we wrap up little boy Johnny in a string of actual light bulbs, make him sit on a footstool, turn on the electricity and see what happens? You know, I can deal with the goofy bow and the orange bandana background (is this Christmas orange?) and the dollhouse chair alright—but these freaking lights are getting way too hot next to my private kitty parts! Pull the plug or little Johnny gets it!" --MAX
"Bah-Hum-Pug! There is no way I'm pulling that chubby guy with the beard in his rusty sleigh again this year. Last time I looked, I'm a Pug, not a reindeer (even though I do make snorting sounds like one). By the way, who names their dog Rudolf anyway? And, just so you know, I'd wipe this silly smile off my face if I could, so don't even think I'm happy about this gig." --RUDOLF
6. Lonely Child Syndrome
"I'm sorry but I'm just not feeling it. Two years ago I posed in a Lexus. Last year I smiled in a used Ford Focus. I realize times are getting tougher, but this is pushing it—a balsa wood sleigh from the garden that you use to feed squirrels in the summer? Where do I rank in the cute pet scale anyway?" --LUCY
7. And here you thought I was drinking water in my bowl the whole time...
"Psst. I'm not really passed out. I'm just posing for the camera guy. And, quick note—I don't drink wine or champagne either. I'm much classier than that. I drink Pabst." -- BEAR (NOT BEER)
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Oh, by the way, not only is Grandma the author of these humorous holiday greetings, but she also approves our products and this promotional message.